@dizzybevvie THE GUY !!
Someone has to fill this saddle.
Hey y'all why are writers always cold?
...why?
They're always surrounded by drafts!
How many mystery writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Oh god.
How many?
Two! One to change the bulb, and the other to give it an unexpected twist at the end!
What do writers have for breakfast?
Coffee?
Synonym buns!
Where do all the struggling writers live?
How are you coming up with all these?
Where?
Writer's Block!
What do writers suffer from each spring?
(I've heard a lot of them over the years.)
Allergies. Next question.
you were close; A case of allegories
Why are writers always in great shape?
Circular prose
Nope! It's because we're always running out of ideas!
Did you hear about the famous writer who turned out to be a fraud?
I did not
His life had it's prose and cons...
Why is editing a better job than writing?
It's more rewording?
Correct! I am out of jokes. :(
KNUCK-TAT GENERATOR
Use your birthday to figure out your own personal knuckle tattoos!
January: DRUG
February: HATE
March: DICK
April: REAL
May: DIRT
June: THUG
July: CASH
August: GIRL
September: FIST
October: SHIT
November: BUTT
December: KILL
1st: CITY
2nd: RIOT
3rd: FACE
4th: FEAR
5th: GRIN
6th: WOLF
7th: PISS
8th: RASH
9th: DOGS
10th: TITS
11th: LUBE
12th: SAND
13th: FIRE
14th: KIDS
15th: BIRD
16th: NERD
17th: BOYS
18th: MOMS
19th: DADS
20th: VEIN
21st: WURM
22nd: FART
23rd: TRAP
24th: MOAN
25th: HOLE
26th: KING
27th: FUCK
28th: EYES
29th: LIFE
30th: LOVE
31st: STAB
[video description: a man playing saxophone in front of a large pipe. everything he plays echoes back through the pipe, resulting in a call-and-response type song. the person behind the camera claps along to the beat. end description.]
a reasonable society would base their entire economy around this
GUY BUILDING THE OTHER END OF THE PIPE: the jazz ghost is back
"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.
Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.
We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.
ALT
ALT
This is actually very normal human behavior. It's just that most people (in the USA) think "Jesus strengthens me" instead of "I am a pikmin, dandori time"
This is literally why stories and fantasy are so useful to humans. We cannot tackle every mundane challenge with enthusiasm, and facing against profoundly daunting tasks can be deeply demoralizing, and you don’t get to feel cool or heroic for filing 400 pieces of paperwork.
We arm ourselves with stories and fantasy, so that the laundry can become a charming hurdle to overcome, and the daunting stack of bills is the leviathan we the brave knights must slay.
Humans have always been like this. So many cultures have stories or mythology or even rituals about literally embodying another being better suited to the challenge one currently faces.
Stories are armor. Stories are fuel.
